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Question: How can I apologize to my parents when they won't speak to me? Hi, I am a grown woman who has hurt and angered my mother and adoptive father. Six years ago I was diagnosed with depression, ulcers, traumatic stress syndrome and had quite a bit of dental work done in one month's time. I was placed on Xanax, Oxycontin, and some type of pain killer that contained Codiene. I only took the medidcations for about a month before I quite literally lost my mind. I said and did things that angered, hurt, and shocked my parents. Immediately after that the doctor placed me on Ambien and Celexa. I stayed kind of strange for at least a year while I was on that stuff. Now, years later my closest brother says my personality is nice again and I have returned to my normal sself. Only thing different is that I have terrible memory loss from the time I was on all the medications until recently. Everything is sketchy. I want to make it clear that I did NOT take the prescriptions as recreational drugs or anything. I have never taken drugs, before or since. Evidently my system just can't handle medication well. Anyway, things, bad things, that I said got back to my parents and now they will have nothing to do with me. It has been five years. For the first several years I was frantic trying to figure out why they hated me so much over what I thought was a small fight and they were angry because I divorced my husband during that timeframe also. Only lately have I found out the full extent of what I supposedly did and said. I have no memory whatsoever of saying those things. But people I trust, my other family members and my closest brother, all tell me that they heard me say them. I love my parents dearly and have always been a good daughter and was close to my mom. My dad hasn't really liked me for years because he is my adoptive father. He favors his own biological children over me and always made no bones about that fact. But I really miss my mom. I am in my 50s and she is in her 70s. Who knows how much time either of us has left, you know? How do I go about apologizing to her when she refuses to see me or talk to me? She has control over the rest of the family and she makes sure I do not get invited to family functions. Everyone loves her and doesn't want to upset her further. She just hates me. The mere mention of my name makes her mad all over again. I have a 16 year-old son who mom loves and still has contact with, but only when my son is with my ex, his dad. To add insult to injury, my parents keep in close contact with my ex and his whole family. He is invited to their house for holidays and dinners even when he does not have my son. What should I do? I want my life and my family back. I miss them and love them. I appreciate any advice, thank you.

Answer: I'm so sorry you're going through that. Not having your family on your side is a hard thing to deal with. I'll pray for you and your situation. Now for the advice--Have you tried writing your mom a letter or email? From what you've said, she may not read it, so prepare yourself for that. But it won't hurt to try. Tell her everything that happened from your point of view, that you love her and miss her terribly, and that you need her to be your mom again. I understand that other members of your family don't want to hurt your mother, but you're hurting right now. Talk with someone who is on your side the most and maybe have them talk to you mom with you--as a kind of buffer. Or this person could deliver the letter and make sure she reads it. Be completely honest with not only your mother, but the rest of your family. Keep trying until you want to give up, and then try some more. If this is really important to you, you shouldn't give up. I hope and pray your mom will come around--no child should be discarded like that, no matter what they have done. I hope everything works out for you!

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